Men, painting and idiocy

I've decided that I don't NEED a third child - as OddJobb is doing his standard 'man regressing' routine, and now I follow HIM around, cleaning up after him.

Case in point - we've lived in this house over 4 years now. When we bought it, we really liked the faux-finish done in the master bath and bedroom (apparently, it is 'rag off' technique, which always makes me think 'flame on' a la the Fantastic Four).

Anyhooo... this faux finish is a light yellowy-beige overlaid with an olive drab. Very nice, very neutral. It's even ON the ceiling (tray ceiling) - in other words, you WAKE UP looking at it.

But recently, thanks to moisture and windows and such, we need a touch up. In SEVERAL places. (Once upon a time, OddJob attempted such a 'patch job' by, ummm, SPONGING technique over the non-sponged wall. Not a good look.)

ANYHOOO... so we're all sick, the kids are hacking up lungs and bouncing off of walls thanks to the baby crack liquid albuterol, my mother is calling with her standard 'black hole of need, sucking the life out of me' phone calls... and OddJob is in the basement, trying to find the paint to match the master bath and bedroom. Because none of it is, like, LABELED or anything.

And all of a sudden, I hear his voice just SCREAMING for towels.

APPARENTLY - he found the matching paint. The stuff I remember as olive drab. He decided that, being all TIM TAYLOR, best course of action was to screw... SOMETHING.. on to his cordless drill, stick said something into the can of paint.... and completely cover the workroom in the basement MIX the paint.

Only what I vividly recall as olive drab (for the last FOUR YEARS) somehow, OddJob remembers as ... PINK.

Yes, I head down with towels to find OddJob AND the basement doused in pink paint.

Four years, same ceiling, not a drop of pink ANYWHERE, but in fact the OPPOSITE color on the spectrum. NO, he's not color blind.

Or, apparently, SMART.

I'm evil

I just sent my potty-training 2 year old down to the basement with instructions to tell her father "I poopy!! Need go potty!"

And it WORKED. He's actually coming up here to DEAL with it.

Baaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa.

This never happens.

Great weather we're having....

Wish you were here.

OK, not really.

Cold, wet, gray, and everyone has a sniffle. Ahh, winter, she be a-comin'! Yay! Not!

This is the time of year when souther job offers get VERY SERIOUS consideration in this household. Where Texas and Florida - they aren't looking too bad.

And we're finally BACK!

Geez Louise. Sick kids. Sick me. Sick computer (which was by FAR the worst).

But NOW - all healthy! Well, over-sugared thanks to a wonderful Halloween (and enough warm weather to T-or-T WITHOUT coats, which is a big big deal up here).

And my computer is back from the Geek Squad for only a hundred zillion many hundreds of dollars. But it's HEALTHY. And moving faster than the speed of smell, whee!!

Now if I can just load pics, I could post away like a mad thing, since the weather is gray and damp-ish and cold (ie: perfect for a night in with the fam)!

GOOD to be back!! Wheeee!

Checklist and countdown....

Popcorn? - popped
Wine? - poured
TV? - on
Children? - currently melting down as OddJob pulls them out of the tub and puts them down for the night.

We are READY!! For a night of flipping between the VP debate (cue the 'Flounder from Animal House' - "this is gonna be GREAT!!!") and the Cubs game!!

Voting - will be assigned to the team that steps on their collective dicks THE LEAST in the next 5 weeks....

Or the team that makes it to the World series!! Go Cubbies!

Big bad deep sigh.................

A very, very dear friend of mine just moved. This morning. Almost 12 hours ago.

To a land far, far away, known as 'Deepinahearta', aka TEXAS. Yes, I lost ANOTHER friend to a land that has a season known as 'crispy'. Which they seem to think is preferable to the Chicago season called "Freaking bitter cold and windy GRAY".

So I am bummed. Really bummed. Need cigars and whiskey and poker kinda bummed. I've been bummed for a good 2 weeks leading up to this (hence the absence) but today took the cake.

So now that OddJob is home, the necessary tequila consumption (it's MEDICINAL!) shall commence.

And when I come out of my dark poker-needing funk, I'll write more. From OUTSIDE this black hole. Of missing Wendy.

Booooooooooooooooooo!!

Water is wet and icky..............

At lunch today, a friend of mine turned to me and asked "So when is Ike predicted to get to Chicago?"

Ummm..... that would be YESTERDAY, babe.

That sound you hear is my husband sucking water out of the carpet around the basement sump pump. Something about the thingy attached to the thingy and an 1/8" hole and a vapor lock... that resulted in a completely soaked 6-foot-diameter-circle section of basement carpet.

Faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaabulous.

We got off easy though - several people I know (such as
baglady Jill) were in much worse shape, and have huge rolls of sopping carpet sitting next to their mailboxes. Or got to try out their new canoes from their front doors. Or went to Menards for an hour, and came outside to find their minivan floating (saw that one live and in person!).

So all in all it was gray, cloudy and damp this weekend (I think we had about 9" of rain in our town overall).

So in order to keep the kids entertained... we took them to our gym and went... SWIMMING!!