Mackinac - Part 2, where there was SUN

And the weary, teeming masses did arrive on Mackinac, and it was gray, and it was cloudy, and darkness was upon the faces of the wives and girlfriends "shore support", and they dranketh, and eateth, and dranketh some more....


And it was a dark and stormy night.... and then the boats got in! CanCanDeux, Painkiller 4, Regardless, Fineline, just to name a few. And the sailors were wet, yet parched. And they dried off, and did drinketh! And happiness was upon the land of Fudge and horse poo, and the next morning...

there were boats

and more boats

and lots of wet things that needed to be dry.

and lots of dry sailors things looking for a drink.

And behold - for there was An Awards Party!.
And Sugar Cane had been turned into Rum! For truly, a miracle had occurred! The tired, became more tired! The sober, became less so!


Anyyywayyyyyyyyy............


Regardless took a 5th in section, which is pretty damn fine what with 25 boats in their section. But last year, they took a first. By a LOT. So the bar was high, but hey, at least a flag to fly on the forestay (cuz Regardless doesn't have enough of THOSE, snort).

And the party continued, and there was much rejoicing. Or something. Drinking Rum.

Look, matching outfits! Yes, no fashion faux pas is too much for the team spirit of Team Regardless! (that's me on the far left -shudder-). And what else are we doing? Drinking Rum.

The Team, doing what they do best (that's Bill W, OddJob and Tim M). Yes, Drinking Rum.


Corky even brought Betty Boop to the party (she was on the sail up - lucky her. Not.)


A lovely sunset dinner with the Team. With wine. Lots and lots of wine.


Awards given out by CJ and OddJob (yep, you win CROC Jewelry. Yes, they actually MAKE this stuff...)


Just to give you some idea of what we have to live up to on this boat - this is one of the owners, C. He's just been give a dinosaur piece of Croc Jewelry (no mercy here). This is the guy we send UP the mast when something goes wrong (better him than me) and in the winter, he relocates to Colorado, where he is a ski instructor 6 days a week at Breckenridge. The guy is SEVENTY-TWO. As in actual people years. Blows the rest of us away.


Finale - a great fireworks display that evening. Ooooh, aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh.

On the ungodly long drive home, we spotted this sign at a gas station:

Seriously - they can keep it.

100th Race to Mackinac - Part 1

We drove, they sailed, the boat didn't win (like LAST year). And I think I might be off of fudge for life. Yep, it was a party....

But I'm getting ahead of myself... first, there was the drive from Hell . OK, it wasn't THAT bad yes, yes it was but Zenda was against me (that's the goddess of weather. She and I have had WORDS).

Shelly (off of CanCanDeux) and her kids and Mom and I got on the road at 8 9.



And stopped for breakfast for an hour.



See? It's CHOCOLATE PARADISE here!

And admired the price of gas (oh so CHEAP!!) on dah Oooopeeeee (that's the UP. Upper Pensinsula, MI).

See?

The farther you go into the exact freaking center of nowhere north, the better it gets. Prices are falling!



And had weather.

And it was getting dark....

And we I began to panic when we I realized that we had a time change and were in danger of NOT making the last ferry to the island, and would have to stay at some creepy motel with the sign outside announcing "highly recommended by Owner!!" (didn't get a pic for that one, but it is THERE!).

But we DID make it Shelly's Mom Priscilla is pointing out that Mackinac is THIS island.
And me.

Got pretty pics on the way out....

like the Grand Hotel

(Shelly's #1)

Then hightailed it to our respective hotels. Armed with fresh clothing, ninety gazillion women hit the Pink Pony (REAL pic of the Pony) where much alcohol was consumed, and I (amongst others) was groped by a man claiming to be gay. I think he lied....

And stayed out Way. Too. Late.

And staggered down for breakfast the next morning with the very hungover...


and went shopping for overpriced sailing crappola to wear proudly for eons to come! We did indeed find some sailing stuff, crammed in between shops like this:

and this:

because apparently there is a law here that you must have some of this:

every 10 feet.
Seriously.

Which leads us to... my #1 problem with the island of Mackinac. See, they don't allow motor vehicles (except the fire engine). They have horses. And I might have mentioned the fudge shops. You see where this is going, right? Yes, the predominant, uh, reek fragrance on this island is a combination of FUDGE and HORSE MANURE. Kinda scars you for life. Ever been near a paper mill? That smell that just lingers forever, somewhere between cinnamon and diarrhea? Yep, that's what we're dealing with. ALL. DAY. LONG.

Anywayyyyyyyyyyy...............
there was lunch....

And I gather a 45 minute bike ride around the island. Because that's how big it is. (But I took a nap instead).

And croquet. (but I was still napping).

and happy hour.

and dinner.

And a really cute bartender named Steve..


who made sure that Shelly got the BIG version of this drink called a CAPE CODDER (get it Shelly?? Vodka and cranberry juice has a NAME!) and not the little weenie version that the OTHER bartender gave her at first. No siree. Steve wasn't going to stand for THAT!

Then it was time to head to the tent at the finish line, to huddle in the cold and pouring rain, waiting for Regardless and Cancan and FineLine to actually FINISH. Which they did, but it was 10 PM and raining so No Pics For You!

Race to Mackinac, v.100

On Saturday July 19, a buncha boozing many brave souls will leave Chicago for at least 3 days of eating, boozing and some sailing the 100th running of the race to Mackinac!

That's sailboats.

Sailing.

From Chicago to this teeny little island at the cold, cold north end of the lake.

OK, so it's like a really big deal around here with the sailing people.

Anyyyyywayyyyyyyyyy........... for the big century running of this, 460 boats are competing.

With somewhere between 6 and 15 drunks sailors per boat........... so let's see............... carry the 2............. OK, eleventy billion sailors are going to an island THIS BIG:

So we have eleventy billion drunks sailors trying to get from here (Chicago)

to there (the non-existent dot waaaaaay up at the top of the mitten).

Without doing THIS.

Yep, last year. Bad. Expensive and bad.

And while those boozing brave souls are boozing sailing, loads of wives and girlfriends will be driving from here (Chicago)

to there (nonexistent dot at top of mitten).

While kicking themselves for making this ungodly drive YET AGAIN.

But BONUS - we get to see such FAMOUS attractions as

Oh yes there is!! Weeee-sconsin, yah hey dere!!

And if we have our fill of cheese, just wait!! I have heard that on this tiny little nonexistent dot at the top of the mitten, you just might be able to find.. fudge!


If you look really, really hard.

Guess what I'll be looking for really, really hard?

Or in the convenient economy case size

EVERY hotel room on Mackinac is currently sold out. That is a lot of totally bored, probably drunk and on a massive sugar high wives and girlfriends hanging out here

OK, so that's not the real 'Pink Pony', but I can't find a pic..

And waiting for the eleventy-billion to arrive so we can finally have the awards party HERE


Yep, the Grand Hotel on Mackinac. From that movie "Somewhere in Time" which NONE of you remember because you, gentle readers, are probably younger than me. Not that I'm bitter.

No, we are NOT ALLOWED IN. We party on the lawn. They have actual GUARDS to keep us out.

But more on that later....